The need to write

There wasn’t any particular reason why I stopped writing, but there wasn’t any to keep me writing either. Like I mentioned before, it felt like I ended up wrting for the sake of getting eyeballs.

But while I was away, I noticed something. If I don’t write it down or take pictures of certain events or thoughts that crossed my mind, after a year or two, it’d be like they never happened to me. With some introspection, I believe it’s of a confluence of several factors in my life.

For starters, my social network has grown considerably and events that happens in my social groups have grown exponentially. I’ve also started getting involved in more things than I can handle, one of which resulted in this big arse trophy:

So at one point, a conclusion was drawn that I tend to be too busy to have the time after an event to sit down and review what happened. Leading to less reinforcement of the memory through recall.

“If a thought appeared in my mind, but I never properly verbalized it using my mind’s voice or my actual voice, did the thought actually occur at all if I later forgets it?”

Now with that in mind, and then remove the fluff incentives that drove most of blogging nowadays: income and fame. Because I derive thouse from real world, there is no longer anything that prevents me from writing for the sake of just writing.

OK I’ve said my fill. Now let’s get to the actual steak. Look at this huge trophy lol.

 

So many years of literal blood and sweat to get to this point. This absolute unit reaches the height of my waist. We’ll continue with this next time. Let’s go!

Blog revived

Ya, so I am back.

For the longest while I thought something broke with my site and I couldn’t figure out what it was with a quick glance so I just left it alone. Cause the past couple of years was just pure chaos and it took everything in me to deal with it. It was all I could do to hold on with the chaos caused by Covid and two wars: Russia vs Ukraine and Israel vs Hamas. Before I stopped, I was focusing too much on traffic and eyeballs and I felt like this blog lost its purpose and got co-opted by the desire for eyeballs like a sad tik-tok twerker. In any case, it’s going back to what it was intended to be, a dumping ground for my adventures.

So I finally have time to sit down and dive deeper into this blog. It turns out my isp is blocking my web hosting ip. Now, I haven’t figured how to fix this yet, but at least I can access my blog with public wifi in Cafes.

That being said, I wouldn’t be motivated to fix this in the first place if I didn’t have any stories to tell. And boy do I have stories. Hopefully some old readers stuck around and have signed up to email updates, Or they accidentally check back in after what? 5 years of silence? ( I am looking at you, whoever it is from a university’s psychology department.) Anyway I feel philosophical. But mainly just want to talk about dancing.

Oh ya, about that, I got back into it and somehow managed to compete in champ level and beat everyone here in adult division… Alas, that’s all the break time I have. Need to get back to un-fuck the mess that is my life. Stories for another time. For now, I am still in one piece, albeit a changed man.

2020 year of upheavel

What a year.

Chaos brought opportunity for me. This has always been the case for me. COVID 19, identity politics, racial tension seems to be the focus this year. This is a year where feelings out weight everything and sometimes even death.

As a fresh step, I’ve taken on a new group of friends in the younger generation. Partly because the successful group I hang out and fought with are now busy from their success as well and we don’t want to waste each other’s time with mundane stuff. Partly because I don’t want to be too disconnected with what the society is actually thinking about. The one thing that stuck out often to me, is that in many instances, people place more importance on not hurting other’s feelings than ensuring that people don’t die. Which is somewhat my reason for not blogging at all. The truth hurts and nowadays, hurting ppl’s feelings will get you cancelled.

Racism is the topic of the year along with the virus. Yet when you ask :”What about Asians?” Crickets. Looks like violence is the only way to get things addressed in this environment. Probably the most interesting thing are these Social Justice Warriors telling others what their race should be enraged about. Like, they are getting their feelings hurt for you yet they’ve never experienced racism themselves. Anyway, it’s hard for me to get behind a movement when the movement is such an exclusive event to only certain people based on their skin color.

All these to bring everything back to the topic of potentially password protecting this whole blog. Not like many ppl are reading it after such a long absence. And as I continue to move up in the world, the possibility of this blog being used as something against me increases and managing all the new waves of bot comments is costing too much time.

I don’t have much to say anyway since I haven’t had any eureka moments lately. Scrap that. I did notice that it is harder and harder to tell what is the correct answer because usually both side of the argument have scientific research backing them up. Suffice to say, the propaganda machine have learnt how to argue using data as well. So many times, whether or not ppl think your arguments are  based on science or logic depends very much on whether or not these ppl think of you as one of their own.

Other than these, there’s nothing I can say more. The really juicy stuff will probably get me cancelled. I don’t know. I don’t know what will get ppl’s feeling hurt anymore and it seems like everything.

The Wuhan Flu Pandemic Journal of 2020

Well. The show started in 2019 and is on going as of the time of this writing. I will start from today and try to work back the date. Just want to have an accurate journal of what happened like I did in 2008.

2002

March 6: President Trump signed a 8.6 billion emergency fund to combat covid 19

3 bil for R&D of vaccines

2 bil for CDC

1 bil for state and local health

This is part 1 of 3 rescue packages

• January 28:
  • CEO of tinder steps down
• January 31:
  • Hulu CEO steps down
  • Total of 219 CEO steps down
• February 25:
  • Disney CEO steps down
  • Salesforce CEO steps down
• February 28:
  • Harely Davidson CEO steps down
• March 2:
  • Nokia CEO steps down
• March 7:
  • First signs of Costco running out of Toilet Paper and Paper towels (replenished the next day).
  • But Sanitizer, swipes and masks are already all gone.
• March 11:
  • US closes traveling to and from Europe for 30 days
  • Italy announce Lambardo region lockdown including Milan and Venice.

• March 12:
  • S&P drop by 9.5% as senate goes into recess and will not reconvene until Monday.
  • Talks of the 2nd stage of 1 bil rescue package collapsing.
  • Federal will inject 1.5 Trillion of repo liquidity into the market. And increase its treasury purchase.
  • Disneyland closes its doors for the 4th time in its history.
  • Italy in nationwide lockdown because northern italians escaped to south. The lockdown is soft compared to a hard lockdown like China. If you must get somewhere to do something police still lets you do it.
  • UK prime minister Boris Johnson in a speech declares that they will let the virus burn through the population normally unlike other countries.
• March 13:
  • Stock market recovers by 9% as Trump is supportive of the package
  • Bill Gate steps down from MS board
• March 14:
  • House passes bill. HR 6201. $1 bil in food aid and extended sick leave and for testing. Basically to allow people to be paid during quarantine. This is supposed to be part 2 of 3 rescue packages to come.
  • France, Spain on lockdown
  • Panics finally set in as normal food stuff. Perishables and frozen food are also disappearing from Costco and Walmart. Fights breakout in multiple places as people fight for provisions. Stabbing punching etc.
  • Laptop sold out as multinationals struggle to implement work from home initiatives.
• March 15:
  • Fed cut rates from 1% ~ 1.25% to 0% ~0.25%. Also injects $700 Bil QE. Bank reserve requirement cut to zero. $500 bil purchase in Treasury and $200 in MBS
  • IMF prepares $1 Trillion bazooka
  • Most USA states are starting to shutdown schools, entertainment and most non essential stuff
  • Huge congestion at airport from returning americans before lockdown. Super spreader event
  • Ireland closes pubs. No St.Patty’s day
• March 16:
  • Market opens limit down 10% triggering circuit breakers
  • WTI crushes below $30
  • Very high rate of private jet flying to new zeland
  • Lockheed Martin CEO steps down
  • Spain, Italy ban short selling
  • EU closes borders
  • Philippines halts market
• March 17:
  • Multiple report of violence and racism against asians for Coronavirus
  • Oil plunge to 17 year low
  • China expels all foreign journalist
  • amazon suspends all shipment except medical
  • Fed to bailout commercial paper market
• March 18:
  • DOW limit down again
  • Movie theater, Airline, Hotel and restaurants ask for bailout
  • ECB announce 750 Billion Pandemic purchase
  • Netflix up, microsoft, zoom media, adobe, amazon  and citrix
  • First Coronavirus Economic package passed 8.3 billion
  • DOW is now 19000 from 29000 high
  • Trump invoke defense production act. FEMA deployed
• March 19:
  • China claims to have no new cases
  • Young people gather in Florida beach for spring break
  • Canada lost 500k jobs
  • Tesla suspends production in California
  • Bank of England cut rate to 0.01%. QE at 625 billion
  • US dollar went up against everything else. Even bond
  • Gold, Bitcoin (safe assets) falling
  • Short term Treasury bills goes negative
  • Italy surpasses China death total
• March 20:
  • China auto sale collapse by 50%
  • This is officially the sharpest market selloff in history. Even worst than the great depression
  • Reports that China lost 15 million mobile phone users
  • Stock drop is worst than the great depression.
  • Boeing suspend buyback and dividend, CEO takes 0 salary
  • Ronin Capital, a clearing house for CME blows up. Taken over due to repo leverage. Buy treasury then short treasury derivative
  • Corps in Hospitality, travel and restaurant have drawn down their credit line
  • All assets including safe bonds drop as everyone flees to cash and get margin called
  • London hospital run out of bed. UK at 5018 infected and 233 dead
  • IRS moves tax filing to July 15
  • Home sale soared to 13 year high in Feb
  • 14 million americans laid off
  • CA issue statewide “stay at home”
  • Italian army remove dead bodies crematorium overwhelmed
  • Germany refugees riot as 1 infected
• March 21:
  • Army deployed to NYC
  • Fed confirmed to have spent 3 trillion in repo to bailout hedge funds who used repo to lever up 50x. Buy treasuries then shorting treasruy derivatives.
  • Kenyan man stoned to death for having coronavirus
  • Youths of “diverse background started looting in London and Paris
  • 281000 Americans filed for unemployment
  • US postal workers were forced to work while sick (proving that delivered mail and packages are infected)
  • 3M doubles mask output to 100 mil per month
  • Florida still refuses to close beach
  • Tesla and other automakers convert to production of medical ventilators
  • Chinese reporter for white house press is symptomatic
  • Chinese lady spitting everywhere in Thailand. More evidence of Chinese intentionally spreading.
  • Only 3 days to go from 200k cases to 300k cases
  • Flight halted to NYC
  • Massive surge in number of death : UK France Germany Italy SPain
  • Italy in full lockdown
  • Germany granting $365 billion aid package
  • The 3rd US aid package is going up to 2 Trillion
  • Italy going full lock down stopping even industrial activities
• March 25
  • Many things happened in many countries, but the general theme is more restriction towards gathering. Reduction of size from 100 to 50, 20, 10 and eventually 2.
  • Countries eventually lock down with army deployed as people doesn’t listen
  • Congress’s original aid package #3 was $900 billion. It now has blown up to 2Trillion ~2.5Trillion. Have passed senate, and been bounced back to house to be approved. Grandstanding occurred and delayed. White house is willing to sign it. Market has been rebounding in anticipation of it
  • Fed treasury has been monetizing debt for a while now. There is going to be 4 Trillion in QE. Total of 6 Trillion in stimulus will add 40% to M2 in circulation.
  • Seeing paper gold ETF decoupling from real physical gold price. Large banks failed to deliver physical gold as rehypothecation was rampant. Physical gold price going up while etf gold is going down due to margin calls.
  • First of the Commercial real estate MBS failure occuring. Dominos to follow.
  • USA cases are shooting up fast. Mainly in democratic states like WA, NY and California who are more aware of the virus vs the red states
  • Short term treasury rates are now negative.
  • Death shooting up and going exponential in USA, but Italy’s lock down is finally showing some effect of slowing down the infection rate, but it took 1 month.
  • Meanwhile, a massive return of residents to their own perspective countries brought a new wave of infected to previously clean countries.
  • One of the more dangerous narrative that’s been going around is that the economic damage from locking down will kill more people than COVID 19. So the lock down will lift after Easter, proposed Trump and let the population develop herd immunity. There are several countries going this route.
  • US automakers have mainly converted to producing masks and ventilators now.
  • Japan has postponed Olympics to next year
  • India on lock down. Potential shit show there.
  • Canada posted 1milllion unemployment claim in a week
  • USA airline traffic is 10% of normal
  • China lift lock down of Wuhan, big exodus of residents happening.
  • Tales of China Wuhan hospital turning away people to “appear” to have cured everyone
  • Flood of rental units come on the market as airbnb customers disappear.

Everything is work in progress

As I achieve more goals I set out earlier in life, I find myself getting quieter and more reserved. This blog’s posting frequency is a parallel of this new found inner peace.

The adrenaline rush that usually accompanies achieving  goals are not there if these goals are similar to ones I’ve already achieved before before. Going diving for the 63rd time is not worth writing about compared to the first time. There’s no new breakthrough, no new insight, just the continuation of my refinement of a skill. So you see, there’s a reason why I am writing less. Visiting yet-another-temple after having toured Ankor Wat does not excite me at all. The next goals takes that much longer and requires a lot more luck. So is often not achievable. But those are the type of goals that I have to set now.

Part of it, is the self realization that talking about what I am doing gives me a false sense of achieving the goal. It takes away motivation from the goal as my brain bath in the dopamine rush. So I try not to do it. That and I really do not like people who talk big and talk flashy and actively stay away from those people. After having met so many, I know that these people usually are not achievers. They could have the A type personality and is a go-getter, but flashy talkers rarely achieve. Those who have already achieved much, don’t need to talk because they no longer need to get attention or build relationships to be successful, they already are successful. Talking about achievements, only draws in unwanted attention.

It’s also my subconscious way of steering myself away from traits that lead me to fail. So the solution is to talk about my struggles instead of what I want to do. No, I am not becoming a negative pessimist again. But talking about struggles do require lots of negative connotations. There might be other benefits. Maybe it’ll make my thoughts more organised again or maybe it’ll make my speech more eloquent since I practice sentences here.

So anyway.

I’ve returned to competing in Dancesport. This time, I am going into it with the goal of building out my network of people. I thought about it, this circle probably has a high concentration of powerful wealthy people that can be useful later on in life so there are several benefits of getting back into dancing. It felt a lot easier to do than say, Muay Thai or learning guitar. I get pleasure out of it whereas learning a new skill has this frustration as well as a bit of impatience and fear. I can never get into the zone when learning a new skill.

BUT…

Recovery from injuries takes longer. I am not sure if it is because I am dancing harder now or because of old age, I sure don’t remember my bones hurting so bad when I was younger. What I do notice is that my movements are sharper and faster, I am more flexible and more fit than 10 years ago. So physical fitness can still improve after people’s “supposed” peak physical years. But deep down inside, I know that it is because I never reached my body’s full potential at the age where maximum fitness an be achieved. Looking back, it will probably be one of my bigger regrets. What if…. what if…. The culture where I grew up in and the amount of space around available for sports just isn’t there. I discovered physical fitness way too late in my life, just as I have discovered dancing way too late.

So here I am, in some sort of physical pain every night. But if you look back to when I first started on this journey to get fit, I remember being physically tired all the time from just working out twice a week. Heck, running for half an hour would make me tired for the whole week, one session of ab training gave me rhabdo. I couldn’t imagine back then, the amount of physical activity I can do now: Weight training every other day, dance practice for 2 hours 4 times a week and Muay thai once per week. For the me back then, it was physically impossible to be this active, but here I am. Then again, I’ve experienced so many things that I thought was impossible in my life.  Speaking of which, another reason why I don’t like to talk about what I am trying to achieve or have achieved. Cause people will think it is so impossible that I made it up.

The loss so far

The estimate of the car repair came in. Windows, + repaint two doors + replace leather on the door + replace windows trim lead to some pretty large sum. Ever since I moved to living in Vancouver, I’ve experienced several events that led to loses which trigerd some really negative emotions. Not so much as the loss itself, but the absolute helplessness you feel when encountering these events in Vancouver.

1. Home burglary: Estimated loss $10 000

2. Intentional Renter damages: Estimated loss $5 000

3. Loss from money manager absconding with funds: $30 000

4. Loss from Vehicle Vandalism: $1 500

It is really mess up, but it can be summed up with: “The road to hell is paved with good intentions”.

In a late stage bleeding heart socialist heaven, the police doesn’t bother to process property crimes anymore so they will only do something if it is right in front of them, but once they leave the vicinity, it’s business as usual. Once a crime is committed against your property, it is up to you, the owner to sue the perpetrator in a civil court to recoup the funds. This presents several problems.

1. You have to hire someone to find these people who have no address and no ID. Private investigators start with $1000

2. You have to sue them. A letter from a lawyer to start the process cost $500

3. Serve the paper (see the big problem here? Someone willing to show up in a drug den to serve papers?)

4. Squeeze money out of stone. These people have no assets and live day to day.

So unless you lost $30k+ worth of stuff, it  is probably not worth it to sue. Why is it this way you ask? Because it costs more to have the court clogged up by these matters and jail these people. In a sense yes, this is true, but what the government is now asking, is for the individuals of the society to bear the costs of supporting these people. Mind you, there’s also the whole support industry that sprung up to profit off these downtrodden people. They are the advocates for rights and protection of their bad behaviors. :You are discriminating against the poor.” So they say.

And as time goes by, as they learn that there are no consequences, the incidents increase. More people gets into it until at one point, the society cannot bear it anymore. When everyone became the downtrodden, something will break.

I believe we are seeing the beginning of the wheel coming off. I saw this coming, mentally prepared for it but having it happen to me still sucks. Especially this helpless feeling where I’ve taken every precaution possible but it is still not enough because they only need you to slip up once. Park in the wrong spot outside of the camera’s view at just the wrong time while the security guards are changing their shift. The moment they set their sight on your property, it’s a matter of when, not if.

What it does for me though, is that it cement the fact that I should not be living in downtown, nor having any of my properties stored here. The only way living in downtown can work, is if I have a house first where I can have my own security system in place and things locked down. While having a secondary condo in downtown for fun. But no, Vancouver will tax you to death for secondary properties that sits empty.

 

Bad things happens in 3 again.

I’ve gotten enough ppl asking why I stopped writing that I think I should address it.

It’s a combination of being hard at work training for Dancesport competition, not really having anything significant happening and being in general disappointed with humanity. There are a lot of thing that happened that brings me into a dark mood and I tend not to write about those things as they happen too often and I am working slowly on mitigating the impact of these events.

I don’t want to feel this way, but every instances where it happens, it just put that much damper in my life. The worst thing is, they tend to happen together and in multiples of 3s. Might be a blessing for my readers as it triggered me to write this rant. Well, now that the 3rd one happened, I can look forward to having no such event for a while.

Instance #1: is the biggest downer. But as with many thing in my life. It is one of those top secret thing that cannot be hidden once revealed. These top secret projects have my blood and sweat put into it and affects me the most and usually takes decades to pan out. It’s basically reset to zero and I am looking at soldering on to continue the grind while feeling really down. This is when I started thinking :”Shiiiiiiit, it’s happening again. Bad events happens in clusters of 3.” Being, in general, even tempered and wanting to see life as glass half full. I continued the routine.

Instance #2: This is probably just my own anal retentive quirks that creates self inflicted wounds. But there’s one thing I do not tolerate in life and that is people who waste my time. Granted I’ve done the same to others and I’ve always tried to make up for it by giving presents or other efforts and I’ve really evolved past the usual German like clockwork to giving everyone a 15 minute flex delay. Especially in Vancouver where people are notorious for being flaky. Even so, if you want me to instantly get into a fit of rage, a no show would be it. If instance #1 triggers depression, instance #2 triggered anger. Which is what my dance partner did to me. Mind you, I would’ve been worried if this was a once in a blue moon thing, but this is the 2nd instance with a history of being half an hour late with 15 minute lateness being normal. As a mild mannered person, I waited two days before having a sit down and addressed this in the way I know. Business. It was perhaps my mistake for not spelling out how being on time is the most important aspect of the partnership for me and the next time this happens, I am out. Since we are all grown up adults who are supposedly waay past this teenage schenanigans and we can’t change each other, I can only change my own reaction towards it.  Everyone gets 3 chances. The business side of me also understand that I’ve already invested too much in this  partnership for November’s competition to just break up now, but after that I’ll have to review it.

Instance #3: By the end of Instance #2, I already have this bad premonition of Instance #3 happening, but refuse to believe that this will happen. Behold, my 4 month old Tesla Model 3 got its windows smashed… In an underground security gated and security patrolled garage. The thief targeted my car only with a Jaguar F-Type parked about 10 meters away. Now, a Tesla has a place to plug in a usb key to store camera footage from its 8 cameras surrounding the car, but the thief knows enough to take that usb drive away. I bought this car knowing that there are quite a lot of people who targets Teslas for damage and lots of instances in downtown for car break ins. So I decided to do everything I could to mitigate the potential for this to happen. Left nothing in the car, parked in a place that has had no such break ins for the past 2 years and with the most security. Not that I expect the worst case scenario to happen, but damn, is this not a coincidence. I mean, I’d probably feel better if all the cars in the garage got their windows smashed, but just me? This is targeted. Instance #3 brought me disappointment in humanity. $5 worth of usb thumb drive, for a $500 window.

Speaking of which, I believe the last time this happened was around the 2008 crash. Back then, I almost lost everything and almost went broke, my parents were divorcing and my dance partner pulled the exact same no show shit. Why is it that dance partner no show correlates with these coincidence of threes?

Back then, I was paralyzed for months without motivation to do anything. Today I no longer lived my life based on motivation, but have built in discipline. So I still go to the gym, still train my body everyday and practice dance techniques, still put in the designated hours for my projects. But damn, having all these three things happen within 3 days of each other put a damper on my life.

Around the world: Tokyo

So many people in the subway station everyday, similar to how full the metros get on Canada day back home. Yet there’s barely anyone talking. Everyone’s quiet, polite and going somewhere.

The whole environment, somehow makes being a Hikikomori very easy. A relief actually at being one as everyone else is doing it. Everyone is playing games, reading manga and doing nerdy things. Even the girls, the grown ups, people in suits, woman dressed impeccably for work… Geisha in Starbucks. It makes such nerdy activities so normal and there are no social stigma attached to it.

To be honest, I really like this part of Japan. But with it, comes the long working hours, the drinking, the smoking, the delicious food… but I am not sure I want to live in an environment where it is so easy to slip into such a life.

The judgement and the stigma of such a life in western society kept me going for greater things. Without it, I’d probably slip into this kind of murky living where today feels just like yesterday.

Tokyo is actually less expensive than Osaka and also less expensive than Canada. I realized that Vancouver is probably one of the most expensive place to live in the world when I think of London and Tokyo as cheaper. Speaking of which, Tokyo is one of the cities that I consider as a permanent city to settle down. My conclusion is that it is a nice place to visit for the food, but it is not what I need in my life. Even though the food is good, most of it is empty carbs based dishes. No wonder most of the Japanese have the rounded face ship often associated with people who are skinny fat.

Around the world: Kyoto

Winter in Kyoto is very much like Vancouver winter. It doesn’t rain as much, but is cloudy all the time. I’d have to say that the weather here is nicer than Canada. I wonder why they don’t have as much problems with foreigners coming in and snapping up apartments like we do. Vancouver’s answer to its real estate problems might lie with Japan. However, I have a suspicion that the answer might be immigration.

It’s been a week now since I Ianded in Japan. I am starting to see some girls as pretty. This gradual change of beauty perception always amazes me. The same plain looking girl I met a week ago is actually pretty. Or it could just be that Kyoto woman is prettier than Osaka woman. Makes me really wonder if she will still be pretty when I am back in Vancouver and looking at her through Japanese eyes.

I am also starting to understand the reason for the creation of these Japanese Shut ins. The environment is really conductive to such a lifestyle. Things are just way too convenient and the food is everywhere. Not just any food. Good quality food. So I can see myself getting really fat from eating if I live here long term. No wonder most of their manga starts off with some ordinary shut in guy with a job where they are burnt out. The politeness, lack of eye contact, social rules. The all contribute to a diminished human contact and chances for relationship to build.

Even though I’d love to live in a city in Japan with so many conveniences. I don’t think I can withstand turning into a social shut in.

How to reach a conclusion

The problem was I can’t seem to sit through anything to the end anymore. There’s a feeling of restlessness and frustration that makes everything so unsatisfying. Others in similar place as me are encountering the same problem but in different ways. One of them described it as “Read 10 books in a year but barely got 2~3 sentence of new information worth remembering.”

With that in mind I begin travelling again, not looking for the journey to give me an answer, but using the escape to actively ponder this problem through forced meeting of others with different perspectives.

My hunch is that this frustration came about due to my expanded abilities to foresaw possible outcomes and predict the most probable ones. Results of all the efforts I put into understanding human natures of different culture and the valuation of things. As a result, it gets harder and harder to find something that I cannot foresee, robbing me of pleasant surprises. It reminded me of an incident where an ex of mine gave me a present and I was able to guess what they were before I opened them. The act of gifting itself was a surprise to me as I had misjudged her level of interest, however the fact that “If she were to give me a present now, it’d be socks” was in my mind foreshadowed a bit of the future that is in store for me.

I’ve written many drafts before, but never published them. They felt more like bragging, like a presentation of what I’ve done and upon a review, seemed so irrelevant because I don’t think it is anything special. Mostly because I understand that the average Joe ain’t interested in it. On top of that, I couldn’t talk about a lot of the interesting (and boring to most) things I did, but that restriction will soon be lifted and irrelevant. And the most important consideration is that, in this day and age where people get butt hurt so easily, the way and reason I use to arrive at a conclusion will be offensive to many. Social bullying for a different opinion is a real threat.

The result of all these fun projects are probably boring to read, but I do believe that how I arrived at them and the internal debates might be interesting to some and write about. After all, I believe it was exactly this cluelessness about this world and the headstrong way I go about trying to fit in that interested most of my original readers. With that in mind, I’ve decided to pick up the keyboard again.